My wind down zone on Friday evening took me back in time to a cute and funny childhood memory. As a child I always dreamed of having a loving husband with whom, we would have such a beautiful family together. I loved weddings so much that I once got heartbroken when an aunt who had previously chosen me to be her little bridesmaid suddenly changed her mind and picked a fairer skinned family friend. I recall one day, my friends cousins and I planned a wedding. Yours truly was the bride. I even had makeup artists and of course my mom’s makeup and copper girl came in handy without her knowledge. We had invitation notes sent out to our parents 20 minutes to the ceremony :-). We didn’t want them falling in our plot. We had mobilized money for ‘quencher’ and popcorn, so we had a full buffet awaiting our guests. Please note that this wedding was timed to start immediately after lunch so that we don’t have many hungry stomachs at our ceremony.
My dress was one of those girly, vintage dresses that also featured as my favourite for a long time. Grandma had just visited and gifted me the dress. Truth be told, I am almost sure this dress had ignited the dream of a wedding hence the arrangement. And so… I had a childhood wedding! Too bad my mama burnt all my photos after she got convinced her that they were evil and that I would not get married if she didn’t burn those pics. We all know how our old folks see marriage to be a sign of success. She had to be sure she was not compromising my chances. And I don’t want to even go into the spiritual interpretation but the way mama explained scared me into applauding her for burning the pictures. I don’t recall much about the groom for the day, he was a boy next door whom my brothers used to call ‘Muko’ (brother-in-law). He seemed like a cute one but I recall he was a couple of years younger than me but could play the part well. I still have a mental picture of the entire group picture we had our village cameraman (as they were referred to back then) take at the wedding. It would have been interesting to share but mama had to make sure Patrick locates me without any attachments.
Why am I even sharing this story? I was thinking about my sugar-boo as I reflected on marriage, back then when I was dreaming about being married someday, I had no clue of how the reality would be like. It will be 4 years in a couple of weeks (hubby thinks it will be 5) I now see my marriage is nothing like I thought it would be. It is much more powerful than the sweetness I wanted to have. It is much more fulfilling than I ever imagined it would be. It is truly life! I mean God has even allowed us to participate in His creation and a whole human has been birthed out of my womb and now growing into his own independent self. What a privilege and honour to co-labour with God in the advancement of His Kingdom.
This weekend we shall be spending our Saturday with some of Kampala city’s couples, redefining Happily ever after at the Ndoa mid-season retreat. We did Ndoa (a Mavuno Church 10 week’s marriage enrichment/pre-marital counselling program) just a few months prior to our wedding back in 2014. At the time we thought we pretty much got it. We had been friends for a couple of years or more and we knew we had a good thing going on. Ndoa experience ripped our good thing apart and after we had gotten over an big part of ourselves, placed a God thing in both of our hearts. Through this experience we were able to define what our purpose for marriage would be and then decided that once we decided to go forward with the wedding, we each had a responsibility to stick it out no matter how hot it got in here, so we could together fulfill this purpose that is beyond us. Then we didn’t even have a clear cut mission but we rallied on the passions God had placed on each of our hearts.
Clearly I have always loved marriage and family. Weddings excite me. The same it is for my lover-boy, the hubby. We decided to start here and made a commitment to serve in Ndoa ministry. As I look back, I can’t help but smile at how God has dealt with our selfishness and kept aligning each of us to our common purpose. What astounds me more is the fact that right from childhood, God is always up to something even with our seemingly stupid play acts. He has a way of orchestrating our dreams, our heart desires, our passions to bring us to a bigger cause beyond us. How cool is my father? It is truly comforting to know that there’s nothing that is wasted in life. Even the years we think we have lost, He restores them.
I am so glad He chose us to be part of this Kingdom purpose. I am so glad He has placed me on a high call and supplied everything I need to enable me to fulfill it.
What dream is God igniting in you?
The world is hurting, as Christians we are called to be part of the solution. But we cannot play our part if we are living selfishly for our own agenda.